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Getting Through The First Year | The Washington at Historic Yellow Springs

By Yellowsprings on June 4, 2015

Michele Paiva | The Washington at Historic Yellow Springs

Michele Paiva | The Washington at Historic Yellow Springs

We are back to chat with Michele Paiva of Paiva Psychotherapy & Coaching about her most important lessons to avoid common newlywed frustrations. Last time we interviewed Michele, she gave us some great advice to pass along to Historic Yellow Springs‘ brides for couples to utilize as they plan their wedding, and how to handle that stress both personally, and with their loved ones. Today, she covers common newlywed frustrations, and how to manage them.

Do you see clients who are newly married who experience any trouble in particular? What advice do you have for newlyweds to get through that first year as a married couple?

“I see two big themes. One theme is living for the wedding and expectations of the spouse after the wedding. For this I say, ‘let go’. Loosen your expectations and focus on being a good spouse, not expecting them to fulfill you. The biggest farce I hears others say is to be ‘fulfilled’ in your relationship is important or that one must have ‘date nights’. You don’t need date nights if you are very happy and friends; and you don’t need to find fulfillment  in another person if you are happy with yourself. Having a strong sense of identity is a huge plus, for both people. 

The other is not respecting the other family, or allowing the other family to not respect your spouse. Once respect is fractured, it is very hard to heal it”. 

 

*”In addition to her traditional practices, Michele Paiva is a yoga therapist and uses yoga as well as other non-dialogue strategies to help individuals express their emotions and work on self-healing. She also trains and certifies peers in integrative adult and pediatric yoga therapy nationally, and works with BodyMind Institute in international training and certification of life and business coaching. Check out her website, michelepaiva.com for more information”.

 

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